#75. Speaking Regular English

One of the things they don't tell you when you become a Christian is that we have our own language. Sure, it sounds like English, but if you listen, and it doesn't have to be that closely, you'll notice that it is a completely different thing.

So, you want to learn Christianese before your friends start calling you a heathen? No worries, here's a few things you need to know!

Intentional: This is probably the most popular one right now. We can't just have a meeting, it has to be an "intentional" meeting. There's intentional living, intentional community, intentional dating, you name it. Everything has to be "intentional."

In Christian love: This phrase basically gives you the freedom to completely bash someone. "Hey, I'm telling you this in christian love, but your voice is horrible. When you sing, it sounds like someone is punching a goat, but I'm telling you this in christian love."

Fellowship: When you hangout with a group of secular friends, you're just hanging out. But, if all the people hanging out with you are Christian, then you're automatically having fellowship. We can't just hang out like regular people, we are fellowshipping. Yes, I just made it into a verb. Now, if you, a powerful ring and eight other people get together, you're in a different kind of fellowship. Call me.

Doing life together: Going along with the idea of "fellowshipping," there's doing life together. Again, if your friend is not a Christian, you're just having dinner at their house. However, if they are Christian, then you must certainly are doing life together.

Just sayin': This applies mostly to the online world. This phrase apparently gives you the right to be a complete jerk on Facebook and then end your statement with "just sayin'." For instance, "Your baby looks like Chewbacca. Just sayin'."

I see you like a brother/sister in Christ: This really means, "I don't like you that way." This is the Christian equivalent of being friend-zoned. Another version of this is, "I'm dating God right now." How can you compete with that?

Pursue: This sounds like something a stalker does, but Christians use this term when talking about someone they're interested in romatically. "I'm pursuing her." You are? Does she need to get a restraining order?

I'll pray about it: "No, I'm probably not going to do it."

Just: "Father God, I just want to say that I'm bringing you this prayer request, so that you can just wreck my heart. I just want to be completely sold out for you. Just guide me, Lord."

Wrecked: This words usually has bad connotations, but not in Christianese. Examples:  "That song just wrecked me." "The worship really wrecked me." "He brought the word and it really wrecked me."

So, there you go! Use these words during your next fellowship time and you're good to go! Any more words come to mind?